Mary Ann Songtext / Lyric

Miss Mary Ann

Kept her man

In porcupine gloves

In porcupine gloves

And

On that day

As scheduled

They made porcupine love

Porcupine love



So stiff and stuck and prickly

He came in and then back out quickly

But, lord, not any quicker than according to plan

Like a soldier

One foot in front of the other






Miss Mary Ann

Had a man named Stan

Stan Buttler

He had no antlers

He had no center

He had no enter and he had no exit



His hair was short and prickly

He came in and then back out quickly

But, lord, not any quicker than according to plan

Like a soldier, one foot in front of the other



And

How he loved her apple pies

How he loved her meat loaf

How he loved her chicken breasts

How he loved her pudding

Served promptly at eight o'clock

Served promptly at seven

Served promptly at ten o'clock

And promptly at eleven

Heaven



Miss Mary Ann

Kept her cans in alphabetical order

Miss Mary Ann

Began to have some thoughts of murder

Miss Mary Ann

Began to think real hard about her future

Miss Mary Ann

Preferred her meat to be freshly butchered



Oh, she killed him rather quickly

Man, that woman was truly sickly

But, lord, not any sicker than according to plan

Like a soldier

One foot in front of the other



And

How he loved her apple pies

How he loved her meat loaf

How he loved her chicken breasts

How he loved her pudding

Served promptly at eight o'clock

Served promptly at seven

Served promptly at ten o'clock

And promptly at eleven

Heaven



Miss Mary Ann

Kept her man

In porcupine gloves

In porcupine gloves

And

On that day

As scheduled

They made porcupine love

Porcupine lo-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-achoo!