(What might await me) beyond the throught-cathedral's gorge (?) Songtext / Lyric

Sometimes silence tortures the lucid consciousness to such a degree that the quality of observation dilutes in the passionless void of my apathy.
From time to time it oppresses reflection and gnaws at its wings until croaking delusions rot in the blood of their self - caused wounds.
More often silence thunders like a myriad of mountains tumbling down and burying life with no mercy.
I am ignominously prisoned in the thought - cathedral´s silence!
Sometimes I imagine the patient crows floating around the thought - cathedral´s towers - I never saw. Vague shadows that shout from afar, mocking my weakness cruelly.
Quite often silence smacks like an old hideous animal that devoured me a long tiem ago.
Here, I am withering in the thought - cathedral´s bowels.
I know that I have to escape this silent tomb of stinking loneliness.
To write this down means a fragment of order in the gloomy chaos that surrounds me like a thick substance and estranging me from myself.
I have to close my bleeding eyes!
I have to forget the creeping silence in these halls of disorder that rape clarity permanently!
I have to lay down all my needs!
I have to aspire to (the) harmony beyond the gate of the thought – cathedral´s gorge ... .