They Ain't Makin' Jews Like Jesus Anymore Songtext / Lyric

A Redneck nerd in a bowlin' shirt
was a'guzzlin' Lone Star beer
Just talkin' religion and politics
for all the world to hear.
"They oughto send you back to Russia boy,
or New York City one
You just want to doodle a Christian girl
and you killed God's only son!"

I said: "Has it occurred to you, you nerd,
that that's not very nice.
We Jews believe it was Santa Claus
that killed Jesus Christ."
You know, you don't look Jewish, he said,
near as I could figger.
I had you lamped for a slightly anemic,
well-dressed country nigger.

Chorus:
No, they ain't makin' Jews like Jesus anymore,
they don't turn the other cheek the way
the done before.
He started in to shoutin' and spittin' on the floor.
Lord, they ain't makin' Jews like Jesus anymore.

He says: "Now I ain't a racist but Aristitle Onassis
is one Greek we don't need.
And them Niggers, Jews and Sigma Nus,
all they ever do is breed.
And wops'n micks'n slopes'n spics'n spooks
are on my list.
And there's one little Hebe from the heart of Texas -
is there anyone I missed?"

Well, I hits him with everything I had
right square between the eyes.
I says: "I gonna gitcha, you son of a bitch ya,
fpr spoutin' that pack of lies.
If there's one thing that I can't abide,
it's an ethnocentric racist.
Now you take back that thing you said
'bout Aristitle Onassis."

Chorus:
No, they ain't makin' Jews like Jesus anymore.
We don't turn the other cheek the way we done before.
You could hear that honky holler
as he hit that hardwood floor
(The whole damn place was singin' as I strolled right out the door)
Lord, the sho' ain't makin' Jews like Jesus anymore.