Criminal Songtext / Lyric

A lot of people ask me,
stupid Fuckin' questions,
A lot of poeple think that,
What I say on a record or what I talk about on a record,
That I actually do in real life,
Or that I believe in it,
Or if say that i wanna kill somebody then I'm actually gonna do it,
Or that I believe in it,
Hmm shit,
If you believe that,
then I'll kill you,
you know why?
cuz i'm a CRIMINAL! CRIMINAL!
You're goddamn right,
I'm a CRIMINAL! yea i'm a CRIMINAL!

My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge,
and I'll stab you in the head whether you're a fag or lez,
But a homo sex a maph or trans or lez pants or dress ,
hate fags the answer's yes,
Homophobic? Nah your just Hederophobic
staring at my jeans watchin my genitals bulgin,
That's my motherfuckin' balls you better let go of em',
They belong in my scrodem you'll never get hold of em',
Hey it's me Versache, look somebody shot me,
and I was just checkin' the mail,
get it?
Checkin' the male,

How many records you expecting to sell,
after your second LP sends you directly to jail?
Come on relax guy, I like gay men right ken?
Give me an a men, "a men!"
Please lord, this boy needs Jesus,
he's our only child help us destroy these
demons oh and please send me a
brand new car and a prostitute
while my wife's sick in the hospital,
Preacher, preacher, fifth grade teacher,
you can't reach me my mom can't neither,
You can't teach my a goddamn thing,
cuz I watch TV and com cast cable,
and you ain't able to stop these thoughts,
you can't stop me from toppin' these charts,
and you can't stop me from droppin each March,
with a brand new CD for these fuckin' retards,
and to think it's just little old me,
Mr. don't give a fuck still won't leave,

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme,
these people think that it's a crime to,
tell em' what's on my mind.
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word,
I just flip em' the bird and,
keep goin' I don't take shit from no one,

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme,
these people think that it's a crime to,
tell em' what's on my mind.
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word,
I just flip em' the bird and keep goin',
I don't take shit from no one.

My mother did drugs, hard liquor,
cigarettes, and speed.
The baby came out disfigured,
ligaments and knee it's a seed,
that would grow up just as crazy as she,
Don't dare make fun of that baby,
cuz that baby was me,

I'm a CRIMINAL!
an animal caged to turn crazed,
but how the fuck you supposed,
to grow up when you weren't raised,
So as I got older, and I got a lot taller,
my dick shrunk smaller and my balls got larger,
I drank more liquor to fuck you up quicker,
then you'd wanna fuck me up for sayin the word,
my motors went (fart),
when the president got home,
sex in his oval office on top of his desk,
he was all his own employee,
don't ignore me you won't avoid me,
you can't miss me i'm white blonde hair,
and my nose is pointy I'm the bad guy,
who makes fun of people that die,
in plane crashes and laugh as long,
as it aint happenen to him,
Slim Shady I'm as crazy as him,
and Kim combined, (the maniac's in),
The place is the doc because,
Dre couldn't make it today,
He's a little under the weather,
so I'm takin' his place,
oh that's DRE with an AK to his face,
Don't make me kill him too,
and spray his brains all over the place,
I told you DRE,
you should have kept that thing put away,
I guess that'll teach you not to let me play with it hey, (ha ha BANG!)

CRIMINAL!
(Car pulls up)(music blends into the background)
DRE: allright look just go up in that motherfucka,
get the motherfuckin' money and get the fuck up outa there!
EMINEM: Aight!
DRE: I'll be right here waitin' for ya!
EMINEM: Aight!
DRE: Yo Em!
EMINEM: What?!
DRE: Don't kill nobody this time!
EMINEM: Aight!
EMINEM: Goddamn! Fuckin' kiss my fuckin' ass...(mumbling) (whisteling)
EMINEM: Hi how you doin?
LADY: Uh huh...
EMINEM: Yea I need to make a withdrawl, (bag opening)
EMINEM: Put the fuckin money in the bag bitch or i'm gonna kill you!
LADY: Oh my god!
EMINEM: I'm not gonna kill you.
LADY: (mumbling different things)
EMINEM: I told you I'm not gonna fuckin' kill you!
LADY: Don't kill me!
EMINEM: Hurry the fuck up!
(*BANG*)
EMINEM: Thank you!
(music starts again)

Windows tinted on my ride when I drive in it,
so when I rob a bank run out and just dive in it,
and so I be desguised in it,
and if anybody identifies the guy in it,
I hide for five minutes,
come back, shoot the eyewitness,
and fire at the private eye hide the pry in my business,
die bitches! bastards, rats, pests,
this puppy's lucky i didn't blast his ass yet,
If I ever gave a fuck I'd shave my nuts,
tuck my dick in between my legs and cluck,
you motherfuckin' chickens ain't brave enough,
to say the stuff I say so just tape it shut,
shit half the shit I say I just make it up,
to make you mad so kiss my white naked ass,
And if it's not a rapper I make it as,
I'm gonna be fuckin' rapist in a Jason mask.

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme,
these people think that it's a crime to,
tell em' what's on my mind.
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word,
I just flip em' the bird and keep goin',
I don't take shit from no one.

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme,
these people think that it's a crime to,
tell em' what's on my mind.
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word,
I just flip em' the bird and keep goin',
I don't take shit from no one.

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme,
these people think that it's a crime to,
tell em' what's on my mind.
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word,
I just flip em' the bird and keep goin',
I don't take shit from no one.

I'm a CRIMINAL!
Cuz every time that I write a rhyme,
these people think that it's a crime to,
tell em' what's on my mind.
I guess I'm a CRIMINAL!
I don't gotta say a word,
I just flip em' the bird and keep goin',
I don't take shit from no one.

I AM A CRIMINAL! (*BANG*)